Cake or death

If you were to wonder into a record store in Glasgow, you might see a sad figure looking at the CD around the Ha section. He would rumage around looking for the latest Lee Hazelwood CD "cake or death". Many times, in many different shops he raises his bloated little head and mutters a dark curse and leaves the shop with his hands clutching the empty air. But today, in fopps in the fabulous West End of Glasgow, he finds the CD he wants in another section. He clutches it to his breast and gives a little yelp of joy, that is throttled by the startled stares of his fellow shoppers.