Monday, December 29, 2008

F**k it

My brother gave me the book "F**k it" by John Parkin for Christmas. This is a self help book, based on the idea of "letting go", using the swear word as a metaphor. I read it on the train back from Burnley to Glasgow. On the section on relationships, there was a section on testing partner problems. One of the toxic questions was "will you wtill love me when I am old or cripled?" This made me think that we really need is a computer modelling program, that would allow a more definite test. Rather than your partner asking annoying questions, it would be much better to put both people in a virtual environment and really test the relationship to breaking point. Want to know whether your partner will still love you if you get sent to prison, or lose your left leg, then all you need to do is to sit in my virtual simulator, and in an about you will know the truth. Why waste a decade of your life? One possible disadvantage would be that marriage would really fall off. Of course I would be very rich, so it would not all be bad news. Since I usually say totally the wrong thing, I would build in a hidden AI into the simulator, so the AI would say the right things, while I cleaned the sheets on my bed and made sure that I had enough condoms. Now that I am feeling a bit more refreshed, I can finally start writing my own self help book called "Can't be arsed!"